Years ago, I was performing with the Honolulu Symphony Pops on a night that featured the great entertainer, Ben Vereen. That night he shared something profound with the audience. “80% of the people in the World you complain to don’t care and the other 20% are glad that it’s your problem and not theirs.”

As the saying goes, if I had a nickel for every time someone griped to me about something…well, I’d have some serious cash. What Ben was sharing that night was funny and true, ya? We don’t really want to hear other people’s gripes. Sometimes we enjoy it if we share the same problem but usually, it’s just plain annoying to listen to someone go on and on about how terrible their life is. At some point we want to ask, “Okay so what are you going to do about it?”
Of course, that question will piss off the person who is complaining but it is a valid question. While there are some things that happen in life which we have no control over, most of our problems are really in our control. We have a choice whether we want to be a hamster running in a wheel or REALLY solve things and move on.
Think about this. EVERY SECOND YOU COMPLAIN, YOU LOOSE THAT SECOND FOREVER NEVER TO BE LIVED AGAIN! As the saying goes, “life is short” AND it’s even shorter when we waste our precious time in a negative downward complaining cycle. If you are feeling that way now and REALLY want to get out of that cycle, you need to use your GIFTS and have a DREAM or a vision for your life.
Your GIFTS are something that:

  1. You are good at
  2. Makes you happy when you do it
  3. Makes other people happy

Your DREAM is a vision of who you want be and what you want to experience in your life. When you live your life using your gifts every day and can clearly write and say your dream to yourself throughout the day, you will develop a forcefield against negative thinking and start to see solutions where you previously saw only problems. You will also become an expert in what you DO like because your mental energy will be consistently focused on what you want. The things you used to complain about will become trivial.
For help discovering your gifts and dreams, I created a process called Dream Setting in 2011. I made it because of the personal and professional challenges I was facing at the time. It’s all in an inexpensive ebook/audio book called Gifted and has helped me and many others create new fulfilling lives.
Thanks for reading my blog. Be well my friend!